Rambling is defined by Webster as:

·      passing from one topic to another

·      using or containing more words than necessary to express an idea

Reality is defined by Webster as:

·      the quality or state of being real

·      a real event, entity, or state of affairs

·      totality of real things and events

·      something that is neither derivative nor dependent but exists necessarily

-Isms are just my own colloquialisms .

The One About Lost Love

Few months ago, I got in touch with my childhood love because of my extended Cameroonian family. We lost touch and life happens! Oh, If I only knew just how well life was about to happen for me. I was so happy to hear from him, OMG did I mention that he is based in Asia? 

Facebook

He posts “I am getting married”.  I was all versions of floored. Look, I can take a punch or two because I dish out a few. However, I was all versions of floored. So, what did I do?

I $%^&* Adulted, yes Adulted. 

I wrote, Omg congratulations!! Now if you know me personally, you would have read that as “#$$$%%^@@#!” …. I am not even going to say that I must have read that Facebook post 50 times in the cafe, nope.  

Wait, Can I share the Kick-you-in-the-crotch spit-on-your-neck fantastic part? I am sorry, you have never heard the term, Kick-you-in-the-crotch spit-on-your-neck?

Oh #$%^&* lucky you.

Rachel can explain it better than me...

He got married a day before my birthday.....

Q in Robyn

You know it is a complicated hurt and it is weird and strange for a host of reasons. He is a moment in my life that I was not going through some form of trauma or exploitation. 
I was/am/WHO CARES/I DO… just felt down about it. I should also point out here, I feel very abnormal about marriage. Shit, while we are at it, I think monogamy is strange. 

BUT

My birth parents are divorced, and I am brave enough to say that holds (some) weight into why that word just bothers me. 

During my teen years, I hung out with 8 kids that only 7 came from two parent households.

Throughout undergrad, everyone I hung out with after class for extra studies…DIVORCE

My grandparents on both sides are divorced

My maternal uncles are all divorced

My paternal side all divorced….

Oh wait, myself and 6 of my 7 close high school mates also ended up getting divorces before 25. 

SO WHY THE HELL WAS I SINGING

I mean it is him. I was very much infatuated with him as a kid but getting in touch and finding out, what man he grew to be and will be...... Anyway, I dealt with this as I always deal with the bullshit of life. 

Coffee

             Chocolate,

              and Ice-cream (YES, THE FROZEN COW SNUT! OH, IT IS BAD ON THIS LEVEL).

It is bad when I go for ice-cream. On the faithful night that it was confirmed, Agent Orange would be the commander in chief of the United States, I ate Ice-Cream. It is not important to know just how much, just that I ate ice-cream. My father called like he already knew, he even asked if I ate Ice-Cream and asked, "Are you okay?”

 I am for diversity and equality, but I will not accept orange people. I do not drink but after the Facebook post, I consumed Chocolate, Coffee, and Ice-Cream together. I say no to fermented potato juice because it is bad for your liver. However, I say yes to Diabetes, who needs two legs? 

With all that sadness, I found out he ate the swine. I think I cried a bit more because on top of all of it, he ate the SWINE.  I just cannot DEAL with that piece. I have tried to process the pork eating FOLK, but I am sorry, I say no like people who refuse to go to rehab....

Amy tell these folks...

I am also a sneeze away from mammal eating folk. I am often asked, “OMG, WHO CAN YOU DATE?”.
I have never had a problem with pork and dating. It is simple you can eat pork, you just cannot date me. See no problem at all?
Honestly 99.9999% of people I interact with, let alone “date” do not eat pork and try to avoid meat, smoking, alcohol. 

Oh well such is life!

BUT HERE IS SOME ROXETTE TO REALLY LET YOU KNOW…IT HURTS…

BIRTHDAYS & ELEPHANTS

I am in Thailand to research on eating bugs and why not celebrate my day of birth with my elephants.

Keeka & Lisu will serve authentic cuisine from the continent and this includes insects as well. I wanted to see how they prepare their bugs and insects. I have to say grasshoppers, crickets and silkworms will be the most delicious insects to serve. They are clean, high in protein and green friendly. I am hoping as a company we contribute to the Entomophagy economy of Africa.

On my earth strong, I served my elephants. The logo of the company is an elephant because it symbolizes diplomacy. Why don’t you know this? The Romans, Colonialism and the B.S. I played in mud, cooked, clean and swam in the lake with the elephants.

I am not sure how that is possible because I do not swim. I see large bodies of water and I swear to you my ancestors from the Atlantic Ocean and those that were pushed into the Atlantic Ocean start telling me

 

Imagine my surprise, I was swimming on top of the elephant. Then again, my maternal roots claim, we are elephants and mermaids as well. The caretakers kept saying, the elephants really like you. Elephants are majestic, loving, calm and adorable. They are vegetarians, they spend 4 hours sleeping and the rest eating and playing in water or mud.

However for self- defense, make no mistake, they will stomp you to death. I should add that this is a great metaphor for me.

Anyway, I remember my last birthday just saying over and over, I will start this company. I will go to South Korea because after all…

.... BACK TO THE BUSINESS...THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS

LEAVING SOUTH KOREA??

Okay so wow!! So much has happened, and I am not sure on the terms “good” or “bad”, but here is what you missed so far.

I attended the Global Women’s Forum in Busan. I met the woman responsible for why Seoul even got the opportunity to host the Olympics in the first place. I mean you speak of power and influence, it was in this room. I was put in a five-star hotel to encourage young ladies to go for their dreams and peruse their interest with vigor. I was shocked that I was considered. I mean a five-star hotel to work in, to go ask for driving directions but to stay in one??? The breakfast was so good. I stuffed my bag with 10 tangerines and that was dinner.

the hits just keep coming...

February 22nd, I must find a new place because my lease is up! I need a place to stay if I am going to stay in Seoul.  I do not see that happening because I have no funds. This is a startup by just one person. While I can see that things are moving in some ways, I also feel that I am quite behind in many ways.

Okay, let us recap

First two events, I am a guest.

Third, I am a guest speaker. My hotel is paid for and I am offered a kitchen for my gastro series by the organizer. I can only pursue this project, if I have a place to stay.

Fourth event-My transportation, food and hotel are paid for.

Maybe, my fifth will be a contract? I have not yet secured a contract for ESE & SEGYE.

I have to set up a calendar for next year and this must include: ESE & SEGYE, WATER & CASSAVA, KEEKA & LISU AND THE COCOYAMS &

I need to make money quickly. I have no money and dreams do not feed you as much as they starve you. I am pretty sure I wear a U.S size 1 / 2 … I came in to Seoul a 2/4.

I also need to buckle down on my position as Chair of Public Health, Policy & Administration with Bright Light Projects this includes a trip to Sierra Leone.

PLAN A
I stay in Korea, live on rice and go through visa travels and stay in a hostel.

PLAN B (MOVE TO THE U.S)
I am not sure just how to even deal with moving back to the states. I mean, I need a car and OMGGG

1.       Move to Alaska, but job openings??? Pay??

2.       Texas- I go back to working for Health & Human Services and I am not sure that is even an option.

3.       New York- I do not need a car, I could crash with Mara-Mara but job searches in NYC?

4.       California-Public Transportation exist, I could stay with Aunt Yvette or Bernice?? The job market is not easy in California, I mean it is worse than the other mentioned states.

PLAN C
I move back to the E.U. take more school loans for my PhD. I think England or Netherlands?

PLAN D

See you next Friday Ramblings, Let us hope I can pay rent as well :(